homesick

I know. How can this be possible if I am actually home? I'm homesick for slo. Or maybe sick of home. Your pick. Its been a week and not that I hate it or anything, I'm just ready for adventure! I've had a chance to catch up with a bunch of friends, mostly by eating out at BJ's. Its great to spend time with the fam and get ready for the next six weeks. But I've been stagnant. And I miss my friends. Mostly, those people that I didn't expect either. The bummer part is talking to them just seems to make it worse. So, this is my last post for probably the longest that I will ever be away. Without phone. Or Internet. Pray for us.

"Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age."

-Matthew 28:19-20

buying cards

Its hard to put into words the thoughts that were running through my mind in Walmart of all places. I was picking out a Father's Day card for dad. And you know how they section the cards off into grandpa/dad/husband type of categories. Well, its sad that I no longer buy a card for grandpa. I mean I was at least picking out one for a while, and its been over a year now. Its just hard to comprehend the way that people come into your life, no matter the influence they have had, but simply because you are related by blood, you miss them. I hardly ever saw or even spoke to him, there is still an emptiness.
I truly love and appreciate my family, even though I enjoy living away from home. But I would be devastated to lose them. I just don't think I would be able to handle it. Maybe that's the hard part. Knowing that while I lost a grandfather, that meant someone lost their father or husband. Man, death is so hard to comprehend and accept. But then again, "Christians never say goodbye." -C.S. Lewis

dear Lord...

So this is what sophomore slump is. Too cool for school. And then I get my first D. wow, I feel horrible.
But I'm no longer a sophomore so I guess that means no more excuses.

last night in slo...

Something weird about getting ready to leave this place for a while. More so than last year at least. Probably because of my situation with the dorms and people. It was so sick of it and ready to leave. And just get away from everything. Most likely, it was the best thing I could do since I came back excited with high expectations. This year turned out differently than I had pictured in my brain. But God is funny like that. He really likes surprises.
I am so grateful to be out of school for the summer. Ce was killer. That test was so insane. And everyone in the silo for two and a half hours. Then the guy who farted. haha, oh man. There was lots of clapping. No joke. English should be pretty good. My paper ended up taking twice as long as I wanted it to but its over. Physics, blah. I have not tested very well, at all. He has been gracious with the curve though. Its sad that I would rely on it. And mate. Glad thats over with, especially with the debate. People can be so irritating. Its hard to work in a group where everyone has different objectives. It just splits the group and causes tension. Debating was one of the most stressful, nervous things I have done in a while. Its over and done with. Its not up to me anymore so I have just got to put it all behind me.
Last night. Feels really weird. Especially thinking that I am not coming back to cerro. We just moved in a few months ago, right? Feels like a week ago. Although I am excited about our house for next year. It is going to be insane. When we went out to dinner, it was strange thinking that I can't enjoy the coastal sunsets for a couple months. I should be honest and admit that sunsets aren't the only things I will miss about slo, mostly my friends. The people that I have gotten close to this year, the acquaintances that have become good friends, and all those people I want to get to know better.
And this summer. Where to begin... It is going to be amazing. I am really expecting the unexpected from God. I've hit this wall where I feel like I can't move forward, and I am too stubborn to look behind me. So, in a word, complacent. Even though that is so hard to admit. Picniking will most likely be one of the best things I will do in my life, but right now it seems so surreal. I have such a long way to go, in faith, relationships, everything. But I have this feeling that God will hit me with the truth while I am overseas. Not too hard but just enough.

best pictures...

these aren't mine, trust me

cleaning off my desktop

sanuk

So I've been in major cleaning/packing mode since about 5, and I stumbled across this old tag from my sandals I got forever ago. Well, around the beginning of the school year. But the main point is that I liked what it says... so enjoy!

"Sanuk, (which means 'happy' in Thai) was started in the USA by a group of Southern Calfornia surfers who wanted something different than the status quo. Thanks to your support we are able to continue offering unique products geared for individuals like yourself. It is our hope at Sanuk that every time you slip into a pair of our sandals, you'll feel the 'Sanukness' that comes from choosing the path less traveled."

Basically the middle is a sales pitch and stuff, but I really like the part about breaking the status quo and choosing the path less traveled. But maybe that's just me.

agh!

...finals...must study...so easily distracted...FOCUS!!!

change that calendar already

So I finally just ripped off the month of May from my desk calendar. That just tells you how much I actually rely on it.
I have this bad habit of jotting down the most random things on it like phone numbers, to do lists on the wrong day, doodles, and quotes. I've got a pretty good collection this time. The thing is I don't feel like transferring it all to the month of June so I figured this was a good substitute.

• People are everything to us because they are everything to Christ.
• Spirituality does not equal godliness.
• If its not on the menu, don't advertise it!
• Growing is learning simple truths at a deeper level than before.

So there you go. All the wisdom that I picked up from the month of May. And to finish it off, my favorite...

• Friends don't let friends eat frozen fish.